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At 11 I started writing software, with entrepreneurial aspirations helped by my parents

… At 11 I started writing software, with entrepreneurial aspirations helped by my parents. Over my teen years I must have designed a dozen sites I never published. I did alright in school, but I was never on time. At 18, out of high school, I got my first job. I moved to the city, went to college, and flunked out. I couldn't get up for class on time, I couldn't understand the "basic high school review" math course. So, at 19 I moved back home, worked a year, and moved back to the city to work as a developer. I applied here and there, there was never much interest. I got comfortable, and although ashamed to sickness, I managed to spend the pandemic years not working at all. I suppose my ego and immaturity "prevented" me from working a regular job. At 23 I moved back to my home town, to work my 3rd job ever, as a cleaner alongside a bunch of teens. After a year of that, I moved to a new big city, swallowed my pride and immediately got another cleaning job. I hoped to move on from that, maybe to software, maybe some new calling. …

Original discussionAsk HN: Has anyone else been unemployed for over two years?565 source comments · at import
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BI

To get out of the isolation cycle you have to stop isolating yourself. Go for a walk and talk to a stranger. I talked to a random dude for 45 mins the other day and he showed me all the fish he’s caught. Epic. Sounds like you like software. Go to a software meet up and geek out. The friends will come but even a 5 min conversation can have a huge impact on your psyche so just get out there in a way that you feel comfortable with.

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WH

i also thought i wasnt disabled/traumatized for a long time until i came across reading material of symptoms that perfectly described me, and life experiences that perfectly match my own. trauma and disability can look like a lot of things, and the things in your life that you may think aren't a big deal actually can be, and you have no idea because you've never had it any other way. realizing i have intense trauma and C-PTSD and a real disability made me shame myself so significantly less, and while it doesnt make me act like a victim or that im helpless, it gives me a butt load of compassion for myself. because the real basic things that people find easy, i find difficult, and to get the same results requires 3x more effort for me. people can view this as me being lazy when in reality im working much harder than they are. not trying to diagnose you. maybe just keep an open mind, becaus…

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OR

> Kicking around on a piece of ground in your hometown / Waiting for someone or something to show you the way If it makes you feel any better, this song about the fleeting nature of time is fifty years old and Roger Waters is still touring.

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JA

It seems like the problem is the home and your parents. Think about it logically, if you had a kid would you let them end up like you? You need like some complete psychological and lifestyle reset. Consider joining the military, volunteering in Africa, working on an oilrig, anything as long as it's extreme. Like, whatever most firmly cuts off your whole thread of lived experience and mindset so far but which has structure you can hang on to. Also find an aggressive therapist who'll get in there and work out what's going on and clean it up, and pay them whatever they ask.

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